Of ingrown toe nails and other breaking news............

Friends, Romans and countrymen......

Honestly, it is so long since I last posted I hardly know how to begin.  I certainly don't think I can catch you up on all these months in detail.  It is amazing that when I am blogging regularly the words seem to flow.  Just now I feel rather bereft of things to say and yet anxious to reconnect with friends in blogging land.

I really do suffer from ingrown toenails.  Ouch!  I used to have nice even toes and toe nails but apparently the nerve damage which affects long term diabetes sufferers elsewhere, also affects the nails, so I had to have a couple of nasty toenails trimmed off.  I can't believe it but I am also getting finger nails curling inward in the same way.

Yes, I know that is all trivial :-)

The Family

The situation with my OCD son has improved out of sight. He is not totally back to his old self but much more stable and easier to get along with.  School work is still a huge struggle for him as his concentration span is very short.  He does get down but not depressed the way he used to.  He has packed on a lot of weight over his illness and now that he is feeling better in himself he is anxious to get it off.  He is finding it difficult to accept that it takes time and commitment. I want to thank all of you who have prayed for this precious boy over the past year and thank God for the improvement we have seen.  He will turn 15 in a few weeks!

My older son is beginning his final year of school!  He is doing a TAFE course one day a week and so far liking that and fitting in.  He has never been in a classroom situation before so we are very proud of him. One of his cousins is also enrolled in the same course and that has been good.. My girls also did TAFE courses after school so I feel it has been a good option for us.

My older daughters and their families are thriving!
My two eldest grandsons began Prep this year.  While I still have all the same concerns I had twenty five years ago for my own children, I try to see the positives as well.  My relationship with the one "wayward" daughter is still fragile but I would say, improving.  Sigh! Bringing forth children sure can be sorrowful.

I see my home educating years coming to an end soon.  Perhaps the youngest will see out Year Twelve but I doubt it. I have a lot of mixed feelings about it all just now.  Many of my early dreams and goals have never come to fruition, I have children (bar one) who do not profess faith, I have to deal with a whole lot of bad character traits which we prayed, read and learned about for years.  I guess I am weary.  I know my children are good people, but are they the Lord's? are they useful members of society? are they good examples to the grandchildren and other people?  And thus, have I been?  All theses questions swirl around in my head.

My husband is having a lot of back pain and finding his mechanical work quite difficult.  He needs an operation on the spurs growing on his spine but the list is long...........  I will be having a small procedure done on my hands soon as I have very painful joints.  Some pain is just arthritis but I also have, wait for it, trigger finger!  When that is repaired I guess I will have to stop totting a gun!
But on the whole we are coasting along and in general life is good.  In all things give thanks!

Love my children and grandchildren ♥

Mum

In mid-December mum had a nasty fall and broke both her shoulder and her hip.  She has a pre-existing heart condition which made surgery risky.  However, she pulled through well and after several stays in and out of hospital and then Rehab she is now back in her low care unit.  She still needs assistance to walk.  The dear lady has become very frail and fragile but mostly has a wonderful, accepting attitude.  She is just thankful for her family and for her carers. I forgive her the bad days because I know we all have them and I also know that she misses Dad.......a lot.

I attended two beautiful, joyful weddings over the holidays.  Both were daughters of home schooling friends who married wonderful young men who are also following the Lord.  They were quite different but still very beautiful and was really excited to be a part of them.

My cousin and I at one of the recent weddings

A few books to share

I also read lots of books over the holidays.  Mum needed help with meals for over a month so there wasn't a lot of time. I very much enjoyed "Csardas" by Diane Pearson .  This is a favourite of one of my sisters which I wanted to read. It is set over the two wars in Hungary and details the class system and it's downfall in Europe. It follows the adventures and mis-adventure of one upper class family and those whom they came in contact with.  I loved it as my sister had.

I also read the Lancaster series by Anna Jacobs.  Fluffy romance really but a good story and great historical facts woven in.  This book also highlights the strict social class system in 1800s in Britain and the changes which came about for immigrants to the new colony in Western Australia.

I read Philippa Gregory's "Earthly Joys" but I actually found it a little hard to finish in the end.  Just too many immoral encounters for me.  I realise, being set in the immediate years after the reign of QE1 that it was a debaucherous society.  I never want to become so affected by worldly standards that it would not upset me to read such books.  Of course her other historical novels are full of similar behaviour - that's human history :-(

A novel I picked up at the supermarket turned out to be quite interesting as well, even though written by an unknown (to  me) Irish author Elaine Crowley. Now that I have googled her I see she has quite a lot of titles and they all seem to be on that Irish theme.  I read "The Ways of Women" and it was quite good in opening up facts about the Irish "situation" post WW1.

Now my hubby and boys who have driven to Gladstone for the Drag Races have just rung to say that the meet was cancelled and they are on their way back :-(  So many things I was going to do while I was here on my own, which is rare!

It feels good to be back.

September!

A month to remember!

My eldest grandson turned 5!

My darling mother turned 84!

Here are my three sisters, their husbands, two of my brothers

 and me with Mum.

My youngest grandson turned 2!

He is very cute and sweet ♥

Mush! Mush!

Harnessing the dog power to save the legs!

Trick rider

These holidays from formal school have been a wonderful opportunity to take a breathe in our very hectic life.  I have got a lot done at home and been able to spend time with the family.

My youngest son's life is still turbulent and we are dubious to send him back to school

although he is determined to go.

My older son had a great break away with his Gold Coast friends.

Another week of holidays

Will it be enough!

The New Normal

I have been reminiscing about the "good old days"!

There was a time, back when I had only two children and we lived a little out of town on acreage, when we had a very routine but carefree life. Oh, it seems so long ago.  My older daughter learned to read and the two little girls played endless dress up and make believe games. No TV or internet but we spent a lot of time in the garden and we had chooks and geese. We got up early and went to bed early and all sat at the table for all of our meals. It was so idyllic.  I like to think of those times because it was fleeting and the storms of life since then have really given us a belting....

My younger son is at school now.  He has settled in very well.  Where the teachers had been concerned about his "social" life going to school after 8 1/2 years of being home educated  I felt all along that he would have no trouble fitting in but that keeping up with class work would be a challenge.

He has managed to find his way around easily, picked up a regular hand ball game in the lunch break, and signed himself up for the football team :-(

It is a school of almost 1200 students so I think it must be quite daunting.

Whether his mental health issues will be a thing of the past is not clear yet but he is

certainly dealing with things in general a lot better.

He is exhausted at night which is good.

My older son is struggling a little to get motivated doing his school work at home alone.

My having to be out of the house quite a bit at the moment is not helping but also

he would like to ditch school and start working.

(Lots of attitudes to deal with in both boys and sadly myself.)

So with a new home and with all the hectic-ness of our new schedules we

have found a new normal.

It is quieter and more orderly at home but we don't seem to be "at home" 

quite as much.

The twins!

It is difficult to grasp that my grandchildren are growing so quickly.

The twins were two a month ago.

They are both speaking well and very bright and energetic!

The youngest of the bunch will turn two in September.

Oh, where did the baby go?

Half Mast

In a small country town in Central Queensland, the flag at the War Memorial flew at half mast last weekend. It signalled to the townsfolk that one of their own had passed away.

Last Friday, my much loved father left this world. 

May he rest in peace.

It has been a very tiring and emotional week,yet because Dad was 88 years old and had lived an eventful and productive life, it was a wonderful time of reminiscing and celebrating his life.  The greatest legacy that he and my mum have left is our large family. Seven living children, 21 living grand children and 28 great grand children (so far). These plus spouses and Dad's living siblings filled the front half of the church!

Dad was a quiet, unassuming man but I think he would have been quite chuffed at the hundreds of relatives and friends who turned out to farewell him.

Long time readers here know my great love and admiration for my parents. I can only say that I miss him terribly and it will take some time to adjust to life without him.  He and Mum were married for 62 years.  She is coping well but the reality will set in now that the family have all gone home.

"It's not what you take with you when you leave this world behind,

it's what you leave behind when you go."

♥♥♥

Of Babies, big boys and limitations.

Our "baby" turned fourteen last week!

I am constantly amazed at the accelerating passage of time!

He was such a huggy, happy baby.  In many ways he still is.  Life and the journey through it moulds and shapes us. Sometimes in good, great even, ways and sometimes it seems to take the stuffing out of us.  I see that in his life just now.  He is still the same eager, helpful, sensitive lad but he can be a young man with the cares of the worlds on his shoulders.

We pray.

We encourage.

We wait on the Lord!

oo0oo

At times I feel like a young child myself :-)

As I spend time with my parents I seem to still regard myself as their little child.

My Dad is very weak and frail.

He believes he is dying.

Alas, aren't we all?

But as I drive away I don't remember the fragile, white haired man

snuggled up in foetal position.

Blind, almost deaf and dependant.

I let my mind travel back to those long ago golden days..

I see the hero of my childhood.

Broad shouldered and laughing.

Hoisting strainer posts effortlessly to his shoulders.

Chopping wood with strong, even strokes.

Patient, dependable.

Again we pray.

We encourage.

And wait on the Lord.

oo0oo

Old age limits my parents greatly.

But they accept, for the most part, with dignity and acceptance.

I feel limited by my lack of health and strength

yet I know and rejoice that

"The joy of the Lord is my strength"!

and

"Godliness with contentment is great gain."

Isaiah 40:31

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

These Two Years

If you were serving two years in prison it would be a very long time indeed.  Even if one was travelling or working but away from home, a two year sojourn would seem a long time to be parted from family and friends.

How amazing that our older daughter and her children have lived with us for two whole years and that time has flown! We've had lots of wonderful times together along with all of the hectic days and disturbed nights.  We've built relationships with those little people which would never have been so close and cemented if we had not shared our home with them. 

So after two years my daughter has found a great house for her to raise her family.  She has a very child friendly back yard and we are just thrilled with the way it has all worked out.

The first morning after they moved hubby stood by me in the kitchen and said, "Hear that?" (Silence :-)  Then my younger son came out and asked, "Where is everyone?"   Me: "Everyone doesn't live here anymore."
I admit that I am probably missing them a lot more than they are missing me.  Thankfully, their new place isn't far from either our house or my other daughter's.

Her moving is also just in time for us to start school next week.

I am so thankful to the Lord for his gracious provision and answer to our prayers.  He does all things well and his timing is always perfect.

Rockhampton has received record rainfall overnight.

Some areas have had flash flooding and some are bracing for

the deluge to come on down the river. :- (

If you're an Aussie

HAPPY AUSTRALIA DAY!

mate!

And to anyone else reading, tomorrow (26th) would be a good day

 to do/ read/ watch something Aussie,

being that it is our National Day.

Thanks to Mum-me at Our Aussie Half Dozen who made up

 the above collage for me

 a few years ago.



A Half Century

Yes, I've made it!

Tomorrow is my fiftieth birthday!

Thank you, Lord, for a wonderful life. 

For an extraordinarily fantastic family. 

For the blessing of faithful, prayerful and supportive friends.

For healthy, beautiful children

For thriving, inquisitive grandchildren. 

And most amazing of all I am thankful that  ~

You have called me and redeemed me.

Amen

We're Done!

We are officially on holidays!

It has been a typical Rockhampton week weather wise - hot and humid.  This has made it hard to buckle down.  But here it is, lunch time Wednesday and the last of the school books are packed away.  Such a great feeling!

2012 has been a year of many highs and lows. I guess that makes it a very typical year.  We've had a few good break throughs with the boys reading.  S2 particularly has improved immensely in this department.  S1, though he finds anything academic tough, has really shown maturity and applies himself to what ever  task is put before him.

Sadly, my boys do not enjoy the formal side of schooling and I am trusting that they will find what it is they love and want to do in life and then go for it with gusto!

Come on ~ it's not that bad!

We have some unfinished books which I will attempt to get read in the next few weeks.  Have you found as the children get older that it is much harder to make times to sit and read together, especially on holidays? One of the books we have almost completed is my Uncle's family history, so that is a great read together and conversation starter.

We ended the year with a bit of a bang last week (another reason why we have been sluggish this week). We had the Groves Presentation Night on Wednesday last, both boys receiving certificates for effort and character.  Then on Thursday, my older son's fifteenth birthday, he and I attended the Graduation Dinner.  This is held each year in our little home school group to celebrate the completing of Year 12 or in some cases 10, of some of the students.  This was a lovely night out for the older students.

The graduates and guest speakers

My handsome birthday boy, second right, with mates

 at the Graduation Dinner

Then on Friday we had a Break Up with all the homeschooling families.

This was a fabulous event with slip and sliding, water fights, family challenge and a shared evening meal.

The Capricornia Homeschoolers are a terrific bunch!

It is wonderful to see so many young and enthusiastic people getting involved.

This week, apart from finalising our formal work, I have a number of appointments and taking my mum to one as well.  Then it is time to really enjoy the holiday break!

I thank God for the many blessings and mercies he has showed to us this year.  We have faced many challenges but we have come through. We have enjoyed many family occasions and we are blessed to have all of the grandparents living and contributing so much to our lives.

We have learned to trust God more as he had enabled us through difficult times as well.

"The joy of the Lord is my strength"

Looking Back....

You know what it is like.  You plan and organise every detail for a big event, like your wedding, and then blip.....in the blink of an eye it is all over.  There's a high, then a sort of deflation right afterwards.  Then, as time goes by you remember the great event with happy satisfaction and it is stored away in the archive of happy, golden memories that will always be treasured.

So it is with the great family Centenary Celebration!  We've had lovely thank you emails from many of the travelling relatives.  I notice this is mostly the older generation, and remind myself to be more diligent in sending Thank you notes and encouraging the children to do so. I wrote an article for the Local Paper and was thrilled that they edited it very little and printed all four photos that I sent.  It was a full page article on Saturday, so everyone was very thrilled!

Our littlest grandchild had his first birthday on the day of the reunion, so we celebrated jointly with his dad, on the Monday public holiday.

He is such a cute little fellow and despite being a little off colour

had a wonderful day being the centre of attention!

Birthday Boys!

My two boys had a great week  with their friends at the Gold Coast.  As they all get older, start jobs etc.  it is becoming more difficult to plan times when they can all meet up.  They really enjoyed it, as always, and also got to meet more of the boys new friends.  The reality is that over time their lives will diverge more and more.  "Jasmine" their mother is a special friend of mine and I relished the short space of time we had to catch up on Friday when we collected the boys.  She is one of those rare to find friends with whom I can immediately fall back into conversation.  It is almost as if we just took up where we left off about 12 months ago! I pray that our children will enjoy the same closeness of fellowship in years to come.

Friday was my mother-in-law's 80th birthday!  She is a very with it woman with a lot still to offer and enjoy.  She still teaches music students (piano) and I think she will do so for as long as possible.  It is her great passion and I think it keeps her going!

We had a lovely family dinner at a Community Sports Club in Sunnybank.  Everyone was there except my two girls and their children.  I loved meeting two great nephews who we had not met before. Hubby and I made a very quick two day trip for the occasion but we hope to go back again soon for a longer visit.

Nana had a wonderful 80th surrounded by her family.
Here she rides happily back to the car park and enjoys the well wishes.

So, after all the excitement of the September holidays we have now to get back into school mode.  I can scarcely believe that Term 4 is on us already.  We always find the heat of first and fourth terms challenging.  This will be the first summer term for many years where we are not doing swimming on Fridays.  Perhaps I'll incorporate that anyway.  There are end of year events to think about and school work returns and .............

Have a great week everyone, especially if you too are back to school.
Remember to hug your children. Try not to  let those precious opportunities pass, when you can show your love, grace and forgiveness to others.  Life is so short.
I am reminding myself to send that note of thanks or comfort and share a little of the blessings which God bestows.

Mumma is mine.....

I do wish I had been one of those organised and far sighted mothers who recorded all the sweet little things that the children said as they were growing up.  Often now those cute sayings come to me and make me smile.  Also, I am, getting a good deal of new ones to add to the repertoire from the grand children.  Should I be recording them now so that as my brain deteriorates I will have them on record? Perhaps I should start that off very soon.

One night, on Mother's Day in fact, one of my boys kindly offered to rub my dear old aching feet which sometimes swell.  (I think he was motivated by the swollen ankles that day.)  Of course his enthusiasm  waned in short time but the kids were all making jokes around that ad on TV where the islander lady is giving a massage to Rhonda (The highly acclaimed driver from the  AAMI insurance ad for those who do not know).  The masseuse is giving a wonderfully vigorous foot massage and tells Rhonda that she has a great brake foot!  The other ladies come flocking around trying to get Rhonda's business but this determined woman says possessively. "Rhonda is mine.  Rhonda is mine."

When my son ditched me my 3 1/2 year old grandson came over and began to ever so gently rub my feet.  "Mumma is mine" he grinned up at the older boys,  What a precious little man!

An hundred times a day I have to smile at the questions and sweet observations of the little folk around me.
Can you credit that the twins will be one in another few weeks??!!  They are running everywhere now and particularly the little princess is saying a few words.  She is a little feisty.  Her blue eyed brother is a much more laid back nature but they can both roar if they feel they are not being heard or understood!  The littlest grandie is like a koala.  Very cute and cuddly.  He is crawling everywhere and pulling himself so will not be left out for very much longer.

We were without the computer all last week.  It was a good reminder to me just how much time can be frittered away in front of the screen.  However, I sit here now and feel I'd like to stay up late and catch up on all the blog posts and articles I have missed in that time.  I hope to get to read at your place soon :-)
Since there are five of us who use this poor old computer, time limitations are always a factor.

Wishing you all a wonderful and productive week.  I know that I have a number of appointments and my mum has a small op this week so there will be interuptions but Lord willing, we will cover all that is necessary.

"But what does the Lord require of thee but to live justly, to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."

Micah 6:8

For the Children's Sake

I admit to a major weakness.  My Achilles Heal.  That area in which I am overly soft and smitten and which has proved to be a heart breaker for me over and over.  My obsession, passion, for my children has oft times stood in the way of my objectivity and at times made me a less than effective mother.  I hope that it has also resulted in a strong bond and affection between mother and children, and forgiveness on their part for occasions when I should not have spared the rod.  Fortunately, I don't think I irrevocably spoiled any child.  Can we love them too much?  Yes, if we make an idol of them and put them before our great first love, Christ.

Now, I have a new generation of children to bestow love upon!  Being a grandparent is a wonderful privilege in life.  An opportunity to influence another generation for Lord.  With these children I do  not need to mete out discipline, though I try to remain firm when I care for them.  The Lord has graciously given me the  last fifteen months with four of my six grandchildren living right here with us.  What a challenge and a blessing it has been!

This week my daughter has finalised the mediation concerning her four children and the agreed upon visits with their father.  How difficult this is for her I can only imagine but I know that my own nerves and doubts and fears have battled within me.  I have a new appreciation for families that are seeking to share custody and raise children in divided households.

As my daughter pointed out to me, her responsibility is to do what is best.....for the children.
As always, I will pray for these special little people.  When they are with us I will hold them close and show my love in every possibl way.  I just need to trust that God will protect them and that their father also wants what is best for them.

¹⁵And they brought unto him also infants, that he would touch them: but when his disciples saw it, they rebuked them.
 ¹⁶But Jesus called them unto him, and said, Suffer little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.
 ¹⁷Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child shall in no wise enter therein.

Brain Drain #2

Continuing the weekly waffle.

As I sit at the computer, I hear my little grand daughter several rooms away. "Mum! Mum! Mum!"  her strident little voice is calling.  The twins will be nine months old soon.  They have been scooting around the floor for some time and are standing momentarily.  Before we know it they will be walking.  I cannot vouch for the state of the floors here but I trust these little ones are building up lots of immunity!  Their little cousin just over the hill is up and rocking on all fours.  Sigh...they are not babies for long ♥.

Having babies in the house once again is reminding me just how precious and fleeting life is.  My own "baby" will be thirteen next week!  I love that I have been given so much time with my grandchildren.  Yes, they are boisterous.  They're loud and they bellow and roar when things don't go their way.  They do make a lot of mess :-) But they fill our lives with cuddles and cute one liners and we wonder what we will do when they actually do go?

Each night, the two year old pulls my clothes and says, "Come. 'Tars"  We three, the two and three year olds and Mumma, sit on the top steps and point out the moon and stars and sing appropriate nursery rhymes.  Then the little fellows run squealing into the house, "Dinosaurs!" as car lights come down the road.  Like a lot of little boys they love dinosaurs and loud roaring creatures.  Then we all snuggle in for "'Tory Time".  Sweet dreams, little men. ♥

I really think that draining my brain has worked to some degree.  Much of my fogginess has lifted which is a puzzle to me as I was attributing it to medication.  None of which has changed.  But yes, definitely feeling sharper.  I still need a lot of sleep but managing.  I am actually fairly happy with how our school days are panning out though I admit to many doubts and fears.  The boys and I have settled fairly well into the new "routine" which is basically....we have done away with the routine and do whatever can be managed!  I hope this is just another season but it is turning into quite a looong winter.

I even ventured to the Mothers' Night out.  It was so good to socialise with my friends.  Sometimes these nights are for sharing things we are struggling with, which we touched on, but mostly it is good just to relax, enjoy company, compare notes and indulge in some nice food and beverages.

My short daily devotional on prayer has been helpful.  Prayer is a given in the Christian walk and yet we do not always use this wonderful communication with our God. We sometimes take it for granted and presume upon his goodness.  I am humbled as I read through the Biblical examples at just how similar our Godly forbears were to us in their failures and faults.  However, the gracious dealing of the Lord with them and his preserving hand upon them is also a great encouragement.  How amazing to think that the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob is the same God forever.

For this God is our God for ever and ever,
He will be our Guide, even unto death.

Psalm 48: 14

Brain Drain #1

Another installment of what has become the Weekly Waffle!


Do you ever find that one week seems to just roll into the next?  You know you've accomplished some of your goals, made the appointments, cooked the meals, but where did all of those seven days disappear to?

                    " The older you are the faster they go!"

I used to think that a very silly quote when I was young but of course it is true.  As my very serious brother went to great lengths to explain to me recently.  It is the ratio of time (a day, a week, a year) to the number of years you have lived.  And as I have lived quite a few, they are flying.  Twelve year olds waiting for their birthday (and being allowed Face Book) find that time drags very slowly.  Roll on March.

#  My daughter got a fine.  Quite a large fine :-(  for driving over 40kph) in a school zone.  It's the first time she has been pulled over and it was a very busy morning.  We had the van packed with big children, little children, oldies and swimming gear galore.  Fortunately, we had everyone appropriated seated/ harnessed.  The annoying thing was we drive this road numerous times each week and just last Friday  on our way to swimming, we had discussed the hours for the reduced limit in front of the two schools which are on that road.  You could kick yourself!

# It has been a hard week for her as she also received a similarly large fine for her two dogs "escaping".  We have had the pleasure of her two LARGE beasts here this last twelve months along with the family. One small back yard and two big dogs are not such a great arrangement. 

# I have missed January and now February's Ladies Bible Study.  :-(  I do miss my sisters from church and particularly their wisdom and fellowship.  As I said, each week seems to fly by and I am finding that I cannot keep up with extra curricula stuff so well these days.  My priorities are clear and I accept my limitations but I recognise that I am more often feeling spiritually dry as a direct result of this loss of fellowship.  It has been a season to re-evaluate my walk and reliance on the Lord. He alone is sufficient.  I know that is one of my weak areas as I am a social body by nature.  I also miss having the opportunity to pray with the others and know more of their needs.  Some times I can (wrongly) feel that I am the only one with problems .  I know.  Selfish.  Proud.

# A couple of good articles linked on Facebook have spoken to me this week.  Susan at Kerugma linked to "Meet the Enemy".  A good blog post on pride.

  My dear elderly friend Nancy, in the US linked to this news story of a pastor called Yousef in Iran who is facing a death sentence for his stedfastness to his Christian faith.  It is a brutal reminder to us in our cushy lives, where Christianity is at least tolerated, that the Lord's people, our sisters and brothers, are still living and dying for Christ's sake.

#  Also, a friend who suffers chronic illness and is often bed ridden posted this status with which I could well relate.

"Hard to explain to someone who has no clue. It's a daily struggle being in pain or feeling sick on the inside while you look fine on the outside. Please put this as your status for at least 1 hour if you or someone you know has an invisible illness (PTSD, Anxiety, Bipolar, Depression, Diabetes, LUPUS, Fibromyalgia, MS, ME, Arthritis, Celiac, Post Polio, Cancer, Crohn's Disease, Heart Disease, Epilepsy, Autism,M.D.,C.F.S etc.) " Never judge what you don't understand, I don't know which of my friends will copy. Be interesting to find out!!!.."

 

This is a reminder to me that there are many people who suffer, often in silence.  Whatever it is that is afflicting us, there are always people worse off.  This dear woman who relies so much on outside help.  My cousin's eighteen year old daughter  with excruciating back pain to which there seems to be no answer or cure.  She is facing the possibility that her whole life will be affected by this torment.  A relative by marriage who has end stage cancer but still keeps a cheerful countenance even when he doesn't know what is going on around him.

# And now for the good news!  A good friend's husband has been cleared of anything sinister after scans of his brain indicated that there may be a problem.  They have waited several months for a specialist appointment.  Thank you, Lord.

So, what happened to thoughtful, themed posts from Ruby?  My own brain is not functioning at peak potential right now.  I know you will forgive my waffling.  I feel I can write to you as friends these days!

The Lord is my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the strength of my life, of whom shall I be afraid?

Time heals all wounds

The death of a child, of any loved one, but especially a child, leaves a wounded heart in the parents and family of that little one.  When my beautiful son died, twenty five years ago, I thought my world was spinning out of control.  I knew I would never be quite the same.  I was much more fragile and emotional.  I laughed less.  I empathised with others better but had to fight envy as my friends brought home their happy, healthy, live babies.

Time heals all wounds but leaves a scar.

On this twenty fifth anniversary of Warriors  death, I can praise God for his short eight days on earth.  I can remember him with poignant motherly love ♥  There is no bitterness just sweet savouring of the memories of our first born that leave a lingering longing to touch, to see, to hold.  Time has indeed healed that gaping wound but the scar is sensitive, precious, just below the surface.

My paternal grandmother had a still born child in the 1920s .  Norah was her fifth child and first daughter.  Although she went on to have five more healthy babies, in her old age she told my aunt that the pain of returning home with empty arms still remained with her.  In those days still born children were whisked away so she never saw her little Norah and yet she never forgot her. Grandma ached for her all her long life.

Just a few years ago, identifying so much with my grandmother's grief, I tracked down the unmarked grave site of that sweet baby.  My Aunty Norah.  Loved but never known.  Her mortal remains lie in the same cemetary as my own little boy.

Thank you Lord, for these precious little ones and all of the much loved babies you have taken before they had to endure the harsh realities of life.

"I will go to him, but he will not return to me."

2 Samuel 12:23