Dear Dad,

 Here it is, your 89th birthday and you are not here.  Oh, how I miss you. There are so many things I would like to say,  I wish I had bitten the bullet and said them while I had the chance.  Or better still, I should have said a lot more over the years.  You were not a conversationalist, your actions spoke louder than words. I know my chattering and interrogation must have been annoying at time. You did not see the value of passing on the oral history until fairly recently.

  I miss your strength and dependability. Even in old age and blindness you liked to be in control! Like telling me which  route to take to appointments etc. Mum feels so rudderless without you  You were her memory..

Tomorrow is Fathers' Day.  So many years we've celebrated these two happy occasions on the same weekend.  So many years we probably took for granted that the day would roll around again., So while the ache continues the sharpness is beginning to go.
Love xo

Dad
88 years old at the family reunion

Trading Places

Year  9 Boarders
1976

About 35 years ago. I was a boarder at The Range College (Our Lady of Good Council) here in Rockhampton. I'm sure I have mentioned before that this girls only school is now only the girls' boarding section of the co-ed Catholic school.  Where our class rooms once stood is now a Retirements Village and in fact my parents lived for five years right about where I went to Science classes way back then.  Where the convent stood is now a low care facility for elderly folk.  This is where my Mum lives now and shared with Dad for the last twelfth months of his life.

The school photograph above was taken in front of a huge fig tree in the convent garden.  From Mum's front balcony you look straight out on this tree.  It is a marvellous view, one of the highest in Rocky, partly blocked by the enormous and very old tree.  It is beautiful though it does block the view a bit.

As I left from visiting Mum this week waves of grief rolled over me.   True, I feel the loss of my Dad much more there in that room where he lived for those last few months and died. But I was also overcome by the  great sense of the "circle of life" happening in my family.  Dad and Mum were very inter-dependant in the last few years.  Dad had gone blind so Mum was the eyes. Mum has no memory, so Dad remembered everything.  Although he couldn't see, she would tell him where each thing had been put and then when Mum couldn't remember where she had put it, Dad knew ! Dad could still remember names, dates and places. Mum struggles to recall her own birthday and much in the way of past events.

So now Mum depends on us.  Mainly my eldest sister and I.  My sister had already been doing all of their bookwork for a number of years and she does everything the way Dad wanted it.  Mum can rely on her to pay all the bills and do any transaction or legal stuff.

I am the day to day daughter :-)  I visit and drink coffee and pick up bits and pieces that Mum needs.  She is quite miserable.  She says she is not lonely but she loves visits.  They tire her out and she does sleep a lot.  She also does not remember conversations and information from one visit to the next but is just contented with her limited life. The other day she wandered a little too far and got herself lost.  Fortunately she was still on the property and was rescued by a nurse.

When I left the other day, I thought about how they must have felt driving away and leaving us there at school.  I was twelve.  I got homesick.  I so appreciated visitors and especially treasure another sister who was at uni then, making the effort to visit a lot and bringing goodies (which she could ill afford), Now it's me finding it heart wrenching to drive away.  Holding her frail body, I am over come by love and real admiration for this dear woman.  Our roles have almost swapped and it seems fitting. She wiped our bottoms ~ and smacked them!  She fed and clothed us and sacrificed a lot so that we could all have the necessities of life. It seems the least we can do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On the home front

I am enjoying the one-on-one  home schooling time with my older son.  He is more settled as well and has  taken up more of the household chores since his brother has gone to school.  I reckon school life is much more taxing than staying at home. In most ways I feel my son has been well prepared for the life outside and we are thrilled and amazed at his good adjustment.  Getting up early and having a whole day out of the house and coping with life can be quite exhausting. Sometimes he just crashes when he gets home, other days he is quite demanding and his behaviour upsets everyone anew.  His mental health issues have not disappeared but they do seem to have improved.  Thank you for all prayers.

The weather here is fabulous! Cool nights, glorious sunny days. Ahhhh.....this is when Central Queensland is at her best!

Half Mast

In a small country town in Central Queensland, the flag at the War Memorial flew at half mast last weekend. It signalled to the townsfolk that one of their own had passed away.

Last Friday, my much loved father left this world. 

May he rest in peace.

It has been a very tiring and emotional week,yet because Dad was 88 years old and had lived an eventful and productive life, it was a wonderful time of reminiscing and celebrating his life.  The greatest legacy that he and my mum have left is our large family. Seven living children, 21 living grand children and 28 great grand children (so far). These plus spouses and Dad's living siblings filled the front half of the church!

Dad was a quiet, unassuming man but I think he would have been quite chuffed at the hundreds of relatives and friends who turned out to farewell him.

Long time readers here know my great love and admiration for my parents. I can only say that I miss him terribly and it will take some time to adjust to life without him.  He and Mum were married for 62 years.  She is coping well but the reality will set in now that the family have all gone home.

"It's not what you take with you when you leave this world behind,

it's what you leave behind when you go."

♥♥♥

For everything there is a season

And a time for every purpose under heaven

I woke up early last Saturday morning and drifted back to sleep with happy thoughts of my family gathered in Melbourne and a prayer for my gorgeous niece who was to marry later that day.

When I actually got our of bed a few hours later I was greeted with the tragic news that there had been a shooting in a school in America.

Sometimes, all  the seasons seem to happen in one day.....

So while I spent the afternoon waiting for pics to come up on Facebook and visiting my parents, there was a very sombre cloud over the day, even here so far away.

Ecclesiastes 3

1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

² A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
³ A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
⁴ A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
⁵ A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
⁶ A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
⁷ A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
⁸ A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

And so it has been for most of this year.  A season of casting away but also gathering and regrouping.  A time to keep silence on some issues but with others to voice our opinions. And we have had lots of times of weeping and sadness and trial but also many memorable happy times ♥
And so it seems, it has been all my life, as I look back from this high pinnacle of fifty years.  The ups and downs, the good times and the bad, sickness and health.

The one constant in my life?...............My Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ!
For even before I knew of my need of Him, I can see now that He was always leading and guiding my steps.  Before the Lord became the centre of my life, the love of my life, through many "dangers, toils and snares" He knew me and was working all of my life together for good and for His glory!

This is great consolation for us when we are travelling through dark valleys. And when life is going well and we are able to see all the wonderful blessings and glimpses of Glory that God has bestowed on us, we can also look back and see that the same faithful Jesus led us through that difficult time.

I know now that my niece was an enchanting bride. She  and her lovely husband are honeymooning and everyone is talking about just how special their nuptials were.

My heart aches for the the families of the sweet children and their teachers from Newtown.  I selfishly hold my children and grandchildren close, unable to fathom what pain they feel.

We do indeed "Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep."
As we come to the end of another year, when there is a lot of rejoicing and thanksgiving, I want to give praise and thanks to God ~ for His mercies endure forever! "The JOY of the Lord is my strength" and no matter what comes our way in 2013 "Nothing shall separate us from the love of Christ which is in Christ Jesus"!

Thank you all for your friendship, encouragement and entertainment during this very eventful year.  God bless you  xo

Rawr!!!!!!!!!

Grounded

"Friendships are like roses, the petals die but the perfume never fades away."

I was privileged this week to meet with a couple of old school friends.  It seems that as we age and our children leave home, there is more time and inclination to renew and build on some of these old friendships.  As I've mentioned before my high school years were spent in a boarding school.. Life long friendships are often planted when our formative years are spent in such close contact.

My old buddies seem to accept that I am a christian and sometimes make exceptions or apologies when I am there and something is said or done which I might not think funny/ appropriate.  This is without my saying so, they just do.

I am  very fortunate in this whole friend department with sisters, relatives and many christian women who have become my mentors, confidantes and sounding boards. I treasure these who are mostly women of faith and share so many views and commitments with me. Our friendships are based either around family ties or faith.  I always know I will get good solid advise and realistic comfort and I thank God for that.

It's different with these old school mates! What a motley crew we are! But after this meeting, I was struck by the wisdom and maturity of these ladies.  True, that wisdom is not from God and His Word but rather a worldly type, but solid non the less. These girls are grounded.  Because of our very long friendship we are able to discuss many and varied topics and share our joys, heartaches and goals openly.  Particularly on a matter that had been troubling me with one of my children, I experienced real connection and a light toward resolution on hearing one of my friends story of a child in a similar situation (Of course, I thought no one else had every had this problem :-).  Also one of these ladies who has had some very tough life experiences helped me to see things a little better concerning my daughter who is left as a single mother.

I love the Godly wisdom of my "usual" friends but I know that some of these situations are out of their sphere of experience.  I hope that I can be a realistic listener and advisor when it's needed. I suppose it is something to ponder as we deal with all who come across our path ~ sympathy, empathy, patience, shared experiences.  Of course we know that Our Jesus is the ultimate answer and we want to share it, but to the unsaved it is impossible to fathom that what ever is happening is God's will. We need to tread thoughtfully.

My cousin, my friend

"You can choose your friends but not your relatives."

One of my special friendships is with my cousin who lost her husband twelve months ago.  It is hard to believe it is a year.  So much has transpired.  I have come to love and admire her all the more for the strength and courage she has shown during this period of mourning. Again, I hope I have been the patient listening support I have wanted to be.

Do you sometimes feel, as I do, that our lives become so busy and fraught with drama that it is easy to forget the ones that need to be comforted, that are lonely, that are ill?

I hope that each one reading will forgive yet another one of my little waffles.  Also that you, like me do have a wonderful circle of family and friends in which you feel loved and are able to contribute to as well.

A big weekend

We have a busy weekend ahead with the Homeschooler's concert tomorrow and the "Utopia" reunion on Sunday.  I am still unable to load my photos on here which is annoying as I have a couple of beauties of the kids! 

Have a good weekend.

Two Shall be One

Three years ago I blogged about my broken heartedness over the break up in a marriage of a couple very close to me.  In that time that marriage has been dissolved and the two parties have gone their separate ways, living lives which only overlap because there are children involved.

I also posted about values and the commitment needed to make a lasting, loving and successful marriage here. I was overwhelmed then by the seeming loss of old fashioned (biblical) values in our modern world where every one seems to think it is all about "ME".

During those years my own daughters have had de facto relationships.  One is planning to marry, the other has left a very tense and hurtful situation.  Other couples not so close to us have also parted.  Friends and relatives my own age, brought up with good Christian principles and solid parental examples. What is happening in our world?  The basic unit of society, the family is being steadily, but surely eroded.

The lobby for same sex marriage to become legal is so active that we cannot watch news items or advertisements without abominable images flashed before us.  This generation is being brain washed to think that self and happiness and individual needs are the most important and fulfilling goals to strive for. Putting aside  the biblical detestation of man/man, woman/ woman  sexual relationships , I do not understand why the term marriage, defined in the Westminster Confession of Faith as one man and one woman, is being high jacked.  Call it what you like.....we know it as sin.

Like many families we have our share of relationships and lifestyles which fall out of the pattern of the two parent family.  We don't hate these family members or avoid them, nor do we agree with their life style.  These marriage break ups, painful as they are and usually not the fault of any one person, put us in awkward positions.  How do we now treat the person who is not your relative/ friend before their union.  I have remained close to my sister-in-law and given as much love and encouragement to her and the children as possible under the circumstances .   My brother has a new partner.  She is a lovely woman and brings two children of her own to the relationship.  It's a tangled web!

Every marriage encounters trials, difficulties, strains.  My own has experienced many.  What is the key to holding it together?  Why did so many less couples part in our parents era, despite equally trying  circumstances.  My parents have been married for 61 years.  They have had enormous trials and griefs during that long marriage.  Today they are blessed to share the twilight years in one small room together in mostly contented unison. 

In my wedding vows I said the words "until God shall separate us by death."  That is a serious vow to make. It was sworn before God and before the congregation and has helped to keep my eyes focused when I have been tempted to escape.  Commitment is one huge thing and for Christians, the fact that there are three in our marriages ~ God, our husband and ourselves. 

Forgiveness is the heart of the gospel and should be our heart attitude at all times.  Forgive those small and annoying things and don't let them grow into big issues.

I know there are genuine cases where a marriage has been dissolved.  Our Confession lists adultery and utterly forsaking as valid reasons for divorce.  Other believes hold differing views.  Even in legitimate circumstances if a guilty party is truly repentant the offended one must forgive and then perhaps is able to continue in the marriage also.  This takes a lot of selflessness but by God's grace is possible.

This is all going through my head at present with the very sad and startling news this week of another couple, also fairly close to me, parting ways.  Beautiful young people, seemingly happy, five gorgeous children.  I was so grieved on hearing this I wept.  For the couple, their parents (my sister) and especially the children. I am praying now that God will do a mighty work of reconciliation for these two.  What God has joined together, let no man put asunder.

So, if you have one, hug your hubby today and show him you love him.  This is often really difficult to do, I know.  We must try to not let the sun go down on any differences we have.  Our children are counting on us to lead by example.  If professing Christians do not love,  as Christ and the Church, what hope for the world?.

Honour your father and your mother

My mum and dad recently moved into a low care hostel  in an aged care facility near by us.  I am so grateful that in their retirement they moved to Rockhampton.  Although the farm holds many precious childhood memories the hub of our family is now in that little unit where our two dear grey and frail parents reside. ♥♥

The three weeks since they moved in there have been very hectic with Mum having a small operation to have a sun cancer removed and Dad ending up in hospital for most of the last week.  It seems their move has been just at the right time and the staff have been wonderful ... to them and to us.  We are rather like an overwhelming bunch of mother hens I fear, but they have been patient with us!

I am the only sibling actually living here in town so a lot of the visiting, running around and chores do fall to me.  God has been very gracious to give me strength over the last couple of weeks. I have one sister living close by who does a lot and cares for all the finacial matters etc for Mum and Dad. Dad is still very sharp in his mind but has gone blind.  I consider it very precious to have had my parents for so long (87 & 82 years of age).  Scripture tells us that we are to honour our father and mother.  I know that mine have not been difficult to honour because they are fine, upstanding people.  I think of that promise ~  that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.  I know that my parents honoured and respected their own parents and have been indeed blessed with long lives.

One of the most difficult areas for me to "honour" my parents has been that of our faith.  I am a Bible believing Christian.  I avow the 5 Solas.  It is Scripture alone for me.  So while I have tried to love and respect them I can not adhere to the many extra Biblical practices that they do. I have complete peace and trust in God that he does all things well and that as judge of all the earth he will do right.  I know that some of my family do not consider me heaven bound because I have walked away from the "one true church".  All I have been able to do is to live a life before God which I pray will show forth my love and trust in my Lord and Saviour.

So many families now are riddled with divorce, remarriages  and de facto relationships that the family tree can sometimes be a very twisted and complicated one.  It must be so difficult to honour parents who have been negligent, abusive or totally absent.  But amazingly God gives grace even for that to those who love him.  I know that in my reckless pre-Christian days I often neglected the good teaching and sensible advise of my parents.  I now know the pain of watching that rebellion  in my own children, but I am also beginning to reap the great joy of a deeper relationship both with my parents and with my own maturing children.  How gracious is God to set the solitary in families.  Thank you Lord.

Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.

Through My Mothers Eyes

A few years before this photograph was taken (1967) my mother suffered a bout of encephalitis which made her dangerously ill and left her with some brain damage, namely memory loss. I was only 12 months old at the time so I do not have recollection of any of this.

My two eldest sisters went to boarding school from 1964 and so it was that mum decided to keep a diary.  That way she had a record of events to base her letters to the boarders on.  What fabulous newsy letters they were!  In my years away at school mum's dependable missives were my life line to the goings on at my beloved and much missed home.

My parents are now on a waiting list to move from their independent living unit in a Retirement Village to hostel care.  It is looking like the move will take place early next year.  They are pottering around and sifting through their belongings which have already been severely pruned moving from the marital home of 50 years, then from their retirement house in town and soon, from their cosy little unit.

Mum's diaries have become legendary!
They began as the jottings of a busy mother of many.  Little reminders on the run of who she had seen, where they had been, births, deaths and marriage. Facts.  From these humble beginnings grew the copious writings of a woman through almost fifty years of  great joys and deep sorrows, loneliness, frustration, exhilaration and every other emotion imaginable.

Mum has been reading through her life - she has little memory of many of the people and events recorded. She asked me if I wanted to read them and perhaps hold on to them for others who may wish to do so.  Therefore, I have become the "Keeper of the Journals".

I had not read right through them.  I have scanned some dates and events but I ran it by the rest of the crew, suggesting I just store these precious books until dear Mum has passed away.  They are a wonderful source of eye witness information and hold the most unbelievable details not only of our own lives but the happenings of our little rural community and of our large extended families. While the early years are short notes made by a busy wife and mother some of the latter years are heartbreakingly detailed and frank.  These are the years of adult and teenage children, bad decisions, boarding school, illnesses,  losing parents and a child.  These are the years where Mum, due to the encephalitis, began to suffer epileptic seizures and eventually handed in her license.  An empty nester with a still hard working husband and no means of getting out from the farm except with others.  A devoted wife, mother and grandmother who sacrificed much and at times was lonely and uncertain but constantly called upon God for his aide.  (And being RC many other celestial beings!) My mother's devotion to her religion and piety is very evident throughout all of her writing and the many quotes and clips included in her diaries.

It is the possible hurts which may be resurrected which lead me to want to protect these documents.  I do not think it is necessary to bring up old wounds which have long been forgotten, among loved ones.  There is so much to rejoice  and reminisce over.  So much love poured out in those pages.  So many little details of long ago events which we may one day appreciate when that little bit of information is required.  When did grandma die?  Who was bitten by a red back spider?  Who almost missed the wedding and why? How did Mum feel about my becoming a christian? About grandchildren? about our choices in life?

Dad has also weeded out his belongings including his farm diaries, some of which he passed on my brother still on the home block.  There was one particular year book which had a lot of empty pages and he suggested I take it and use them up.  The year was 1997, in which Dad was involved in a fatal accident and almost lost his own life.  Very little is recorded from that date onward. However, I flicked to 29 November and the entry read "*Ruby* had a son".

It is amusing to me because it so clearly shows the contrast in my parents.  Mums entry concerning the birth of this son is pages long, detailed, and continues over several days!  It has been at the same time revealing, heartwarming to read these tomes over which our mother poured over for many hours at the dining table of the old house but also heart breaking.  I yearn to have those conversations over again, to have recognised my mother's pain and have told her how much she is loved and admired.

I have never kept a journal for any length of time, saving this blog.  I am pleased now to have this record, which having been read by many unknown "friends" gives a glimpse into our life with all its joys and sorrows without naming and harming people.  I have tried to write a positive blog.  I have tried to convey some of my spiritual thoughts along with very mundane day to day happenings.

When my decendants visit "Mumma's Place" in years to come I hope they will know a little of me.  Since I have blogged quite often about my Mum and Dad, I hope they will discern the great love and affection I have for these two precious people.

It is Late....I am Tired...

 

Sometimes it fascinates me that I am the only person who can hang up the towels, change the toilet roll or wipe down benches! Sometimes that fascinates me, sometimes it just plain infuriates me, and sometimes it wears me out! Sometimes you just gotta be thankful for a home, a family, clean towels and dunny rolls!

It's been a marvellous week with fine, crisp weather. Warming up but not unbearably hot or stiflingly humid. We haven't done as much school work as we might have planned but we are well on track to be finished with the books in four weeks time. Woohoo....only four more weeks!

We have done a lot of nice stuff with visiting friends and the older sisters and the little grand boys. Those are precious days. When soggy towels are lying on the floor and benches need wiping down and dishes need doing I am reminded that the people God has placed in my life are the most important thing. I am so thankful for my very special and precious children, grandchildren and friends ~ especially those of the household of faith.

Have a terrific weekend!

Don't forget to hug and appreciate your family, too!

Tied up with Ganeida's Knot!

Up, up and Away

Tuesday dawned bright and clear. I had a 7 am flight to catch to Brisbane so it was an early start to what turned out to be a big day! It was a glorious morning for flying. Clear and crisp and fresh.
After several flights back and forward for Eye Clinic appointments it was really exciting to be able to look down and see the fluffy clouds below us, to be able to read the seat numbers and the emergency instructions!

I managed to negotiate the airport, the express train, the transit centre and the bus to reach the Royal Brisbane. Again, it felt good to be able to see, read all the signs and get myself about freely. My appointment  not being until 1.30pm I was anticipating the BIG MEETING at 10.30. My blogging friend Ganeida and her daughter were to meet me. Wow!

Have you ever made acquaintance with one of your online blogging friends? Oh, we warn our children about the dangers of meeting strangers ! What was in store?

It is a strange and wonderful world, this Blogland! We can either have a blog which is very business like and does not share much about our real selves and our lives and thoughts ~ or like, Ganeida and I, have blogs which actually lay bare a great deal about our lives. Our homes, our families, our spiritual walk and struggles, our homeschooling adventures. Though we both have on line pen names, it is the real us out there and it comes from the heart. For this reason, I was nervous to meet someone who had read so much of my life. I wondered how we would get along. Apparently Geneida felt the same way! (Read her version here)

Royal Brisbane Hospital

As I arrived at the Cafe a little before the agreed time, I took up my Sudoku and scanned the incoming people for my friend. I knew that Ganeida would bring her daughter and that she wears her covering all the time. That would make her easy to pick. But you know, the RBH  has a cancer wing. There were a surprising number of variously covered heads coming through that doorway!! Of course, when they arrived I recognized them immediately!

From then, and for the next almost three hours, we hardly drew breath! I would say, two very good talkers with an enormous amount to say, met that morning. Be warned all ye blogging friends who hope to meet either of us one day. I am so thankful for the familiarity we had of one anothers lives, families and beliefs. It was not at all like two strangers meeting. More like two old friends (Hey, not so much of the old either!) Ganeida is warm and expressive and though she says she is a little shy, she speaks with great passion about the things which are near and dear to her.

Thanks for your patience, Star!

We discussed everything from our births and homeschool experiences to spiritual thoughts and beliefs. And you know, I was pondering on the flight home, once again, the beauty of the fellowship that believers enjoy. Ganeida and I have some very varying views on some things, but two who love the Lord and seek to glorify Him, can not help but find friendship with one another. I thank God for this special day and the privilege of meeting my sister in the Lord. Star is a delightful young lady and extremely patient. Her head must have been reeling with the cyclonic speed at which we dove from one topic to another!

My specialist was very happy with the progress of my eye and I am now on a waiting list to have the left eye done. There is no great hurry for that but it will be unbelievably wonderful to have fully restored sight! It was over 3 hours wait, unfortunately :-( then the bus, train, plane and finally home.

Thank you, Lord for a wonderful, safe and friendship making/ building day!

Any other details you need, Jeanne??!!

Babies Don't Keep

This lovely poem reflects my own thoughts about my children as babies. I try to pass this on to my daughters, especially on those days when everything seems very chaotic. Our precious babies grow up VERY fast. It is so important  not only to enjoy them but to create pleasant childhood memories as well as the discipline and the hard grind of training them. The house will still be there and need cleaning in eighteen years time!!!

Babies Don’t Keep

by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton


Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.


Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.


Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo


The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren’t his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.


The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

Closer than a Brother

"A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. : Proverbs 18: 24


And of course the remedy and beautiful conclusion to the thoughts of my post last Friday, is found in the Lord Jesus Christ.

For all of us who trust in him as our saviour, we have placed our trust in him and he is faithful. If you have walked with the Lord a long time, you will know and lean on this with confidence. It took me many years to embrace this, I regret to admit. I spent many hours wallowing in the slough of despond when troubles came. But gradually, I came to recognize that each and every time, the Lord upheld me, comforted me and lifted me up. He brought true friends along side as well to help bear my burdens. He showed me how to be a good friend to others.
As one commenter said, we learn not to cling to these earthly friendships, but to appreciate them and be thankful for them, even when they come into our lives only for a short season.

Wrong friendships.

"Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God." James 4:4


As his bride, we must keep faithful to our spouse, our closest friend, and avoid the alluring friendships of this world. Be wise in your choices for many there be that walk the broad road which leads to destruction.


We sang this Psalm yesterday morning and it again reminded me where my only hope and confidence lie.

He only my salvation is,
and my strong rock is he;
He only is my sure defence:
I shall not moved be.

Psalm 62:6

(Scottish Metrical Version)

My Golden Childhood XV

Remembering Good Times!

Last time (My Golden Childhood XIV) I posted this pic of me as a nine and a half year old. I thought I would share the whole photograph of my family with you. Aren't we a handsome mob? there is a great family story attached to this photo ~ isn't there always when you have a great family!

This family photograph was taken in June, 1972. It was Show Day and one of my sisters had organized with a photographer friend to take a family portrait to mark the end of an era. Our eldest sister was getting married in October so this would be the last family pic before the big event.

We had all come to town for the Show and then gathered that night for the photo shoot. I can't imagine the amount of teasing and hairspray that was needed to get Mum and the older girls hair to sit like that! I was nine and a half years old and I was adamant that I be positioned conspicuously to show off my new long boots. They were brown patent leather and long boots were all the rage. I had pestered my parents until Dad finally agreed to buy them for me :-) Dad was not in good humour getting ready. He insisted that the girls in the "Bum Freezers" should not be standing on the outside in those immodest clothes! Ah! 70s fashion ~ ya gotta love it. As you can see neither Dad or I got our way that day!

My Mum was always a slim woman. Ladies of her era always wore a good foundation which probably helped but Mum had a fine figure all her life ~ and still does. She normally wears blues and greens and looks good in them so I don't know why she is wearing that drabish outfit. Perhaps it was because, having so little Winter here, she only had one long sleeved outfit?

My younger brothers look so angelic! Butter wouldn't melt in those sweet little mouths. But looks can be deceiving and believe me they could be terrors! I am certain Dad would have given them some fairly stern instructions before hand, too.

So, here we all are 37 years later.

This is a repost of the pic from Mum's 80th birthday.

Do you think we have aged well? I think some even look younger in the more casual hairdos and modern clothes. Dear Mum and Dad are beautifully seasoned.

They always were a handsome couple!

(You might remember that one of my sisters died in 1969 and is not in either

of these family photos.)

As we posed for this photograph we roared laughing about the top photo. The clothes we wore and the Bum Freezers! Dad is 85 now and uses his age and patriarchy as an excuse to conveniently forget such stories!

One of my sisters called the "little boys" to sit down the front and replicate the old photo!

I thank God for the wonderful family he placed me in...

The Friendships of Women

I really appreciated the award from Jillian, HomeSchooling4Christ, last week. I had posted this blurb in another place, early last week, before that lovely award and got to thinking about the difference between "blog friendships" and the teaching type sites. I'll let you read my thoughts, (sorry, it is longish) and I hope you will see the difference. I do think we glean a lot from our interaction over the net and make many like minded friends who build us up. Thanks to all of those who have encouraged and sharpened me.

Here is the post "The Friendships of Women" from my Jewelry Box blog in entirety.


------------------------------------------------------------------

A lot of the blogs I read use Proverbs 31:10 - 31 or Titus 2: 3 -5 as their header or reference verses. These are such special passages to us as Christian women. We can study and experience all our lives through and still not plumb the depths of these passages, joined with many others which make special reference to christian woman hood.

If you google either of those references you come up with an endless supply of sites to examine. You can learn a lot from the wisdom recorded there in. But I have been thinking about the mentoring of women in the christian faith and the internet, lately.

I was blessed to be brought up by very traditional and conservative parents. I had the early influence of relatives and friends who were married for life, where dads were the head of the house and mums were joyful mothers of children, looking well to the ways of their households.

However, when I became a christian I was desperately looking for older women in the faith to be mentors to me. I began to read extensively and form many opinions about marriage, children, education and so on. I started to make friends, around my own age and also lacking in experience and wisdom and we talked extensively on these important matters. We subscribed to various magazines and exchanged the good, informative books we were reading. Eventually, a group of us got the idea to have regular meetings, I seem to recall it was Tuesday nights, once a fortnight. We did glean a lot from reading and discussing scripture and praying for one another's needs, but generally I look back and we were pretty much pooling our ignorance!

This little group didn't last long. Most of us remained friends, but we had so many children, husbands to attend to , busy households, home schooling that it was not very practical. We also found that though we were friends our differing doctrinal beliefs and the various wishes and opinions of our husbands, lead to a lot of difficulties.

This is going back 15 plus years ago. Since then, the Lord has brought many trials in my own life. Some of those same ladies are still my close friends. But during the hard years of pregnancies, babies, schooling, marriage, family and church hurdles I began to see that the Titus 2 women in our lives are those that God has placed in our own sphere as mothers/ mentors in faith and life. Loving our husbands and children is not something learned in a discussion group, or from an internet or magazine article, though these may help us. These, and other godly qualities are learned as we observe the godly older women in our circles and seek the Lord with our whole heart.

I was young, opinionated and clueless! (Now I am old but still probably much the same!)

I thought my ideas were so superior to the older women in my church circle who had not home schooled, or perhaps they worked, or......... any number of other things.

I was idealistic but I did not have the years of experience of walking with the Lord that some of these ladies did. As trials set in, my lack of experience began to show. I had made an idol of my family and suffered terribly because of it. It was then that these gracious older, and not so much older but much wiser, godly women, began to shine.

Were it not for the love, patience and kindness of these and the openness and willingness to learn of some of my other friends, I might well have travelled a much more rocky and painful path. They came along side. They listened and they loved. They led by example.

I remember once having a good whinge to a friend about something - someone. She listened, she nodded and hugged me. Then she looked at me ever so gently and said, "I know I would feel that way too, but what you have just said is sinful and you need to forgive and change your attitude."

Faithful are the wounds of a friend.

I think we need to read with a lot of wisdom and discretion when we use the net as our "Titus" teaching tool. We cannot observe the home lives, the marriages, the relationships of the people we read about. I know my own life is a far cry from the ideal example I might wish to be. There are many lovely families using the internet as their "ministries" but sadly, like some preachers, there are also those who have set themselves up as an authority and fallen very publicly. Falls are part of the Christian walk, but sometimes followers can be severely shaken in the fall out if their faith and trust is depending on a man/ woman rather than on the Lord.

Sometimes the financial side of the "business" eg with magazines and home based businesses, or the pressure to publish, become more pressing and important than the souls which are looking in hunger and thirst for biblical teaching. While relationships are formed through the internet, they do not have the same depth and day to day reality of real friendships. We can log in each day to a favourite blog site or teacher, but we would never visit our real friends every day nor hear one mans sermons every day. Some of our reliance on the Lord can be lost and the zeal to "search the scriptures to see whether these things be so", if all the research and hard work is done for us.

All scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness. 2 Timothy 3:16

Proverbs 31 and Titus 2 are very special portions of scripture for us women. At the time they were written there were no computers, blogs or emails. Women lived and worked closely together the older teaching the younger. Times have changed and we appreciate all the conveniences we have at our finger tips, but it seems the time honoured and biblical methods are still the best.

ooOOoo

Just some thoughts. I love some of the sites I visit regularly on the net and have made friends with a number of folk. Likewise I love my books and magazines that edify and encourage. But only God's Word is perfect and His Spirit our teacher and comforter. Only those God has placed in our real life community of believers can know us, love us, joy and grieve with us. May God bless you with many such Godly examples to help as we grow in grace.

Family Dinner

Mum's 80th Birthday

18 September, 2009

Family Dinner

I love that Mum's dear, but very time worn hand is in this photo!

Okay, I don't normally post current photos of family so here is a one off!

This is Mum and Dad with their surviving children.

See if you can identify which one is me!

You have seen baby and little girl photos of me, but alas I have changed a GREAT deal!

Sorry it's a bit dark but if you click on the photo it will enlarge.

With so many grandchildren, great children, extended family and friends, it is rare for just our family to get together. Thus we decided on the Family Dinner Friday night/ Picnic in the Park for all Saturday.

This family get together was great! We had lots of laughs and sooo many photographs taken!

Mum loved the album we had made and we spent a lot of time pouring over it and recalling memories that the photos evoked.

Like all families we have had our share of trials and disagreements. That is all part of family life. But I thank God for such a wonderful, close family, who are more to each other than siblings but also great friends.

Here is a piece I posted previously with a short poem I wrote some years ago about my mum.

♥ My Dad! ♥

They don't make 'em like my daddy any more!

This is me at 18 months of age ( June 1964) with my dad. This photo is cut from one of those gorgeous family photos taken at the gates of the Show. The Agricutural Show was a huge event. Mum is wearing a hat. Dad is wearing a tie, and like all Aussie bushman, always wore his hat out, and still does!

Today, this very special man in my life turns 85.

Go here to see my Dad in recent times.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DAD!

Solutions and Resolutions...

My boys heard the expression "3 hat restaurant" on a cooking show last night. My eleven year old, who loves food, and knows which side his bread is buttered on, said to me.

"Mum, you're a 5 hat chef."

Ah..there's appreciation for you.

ooOoo

My post on Wednesday was petty and ungracious...but it was realistic. We all go through low periods in our walk, we struggle with the old man (woman), we take our eyes off the Lord. Forgive me , Lord that I have done this...again.

My heart went out to blogging friends who expressed that similar thoughts afflict them. It is so comforting as believers to know that we do not walk alone, nor do we experience anything not already been through by the saints. Our Lord in his earthly sojourn also faced many trials and knows our weaknesses, though unlike us he never reacted in a sinful way.

My husband put his finger on one of my problem areas . Perhaps this happens to you?

I am blessed with an abundance of family and friends. I work hard at my relationships. Relationships take time, energy, effort. Relationships can be wonderfully rewarding or they can be devastatingly draining. Only Jesus Christ is a friend who will never disappoint or let us down.Sometimes I look too much to the affirmation of those around me instead of looking to the Lord. I need to never become bitter and twisted, nor loose the desire to be a quiet witness for my Lord. But I need to toughen up, be inwardly strong, while maintaining that tenderness.

For:

"We are more than conquerors through him that loved us."

Romans 8:37

I joyed when to the house of God......

Yesterday marked the closing of an era.


Last night we held our last worship service in the little old-style church where I have attended for the last 24 years, since I first became a christian. THE CHURCH of course is the body of believers in the Lord Jesus Christ, but I am referring to our little church building. I have been thinking upon those years, the great joys, the depths of sorrow, in which we have celebrated and mourned together as a congregation. Here is a little snippet of why this is an occasion tinged with sadness for me, even though we are just moving along to a new meeting place.

Though I had already professed faith, I first heard the gospel preached sweet and clear .

I was deeply moved by the singing of Psalms in the worship of God.

I made a public profession of my faith, having already been baptised.

I married my husband in 1985.

The congregation mourned with us on the death of our first son '87.

The congregation joyed with us on the births and baptisms of our four children.

We've buried beloved saints after thanksgiving services here.

We've witnessed the marriages, professions of faith and baptisms of other members.

We've welcomed strangers and fellow Christians in our midst-

and grieved when dear ones have left for various reasons.

We've seen our much loved Pastor of 25 years decline in health and retire -

and welcomed our Godly new shepherd - an answered prayer.

We've worshipped together, we've communed around the Lord's table

and shared many a meal in the hall out the back.

-

The CHURCH is the people of God, this church building is the four walls in which our small part of that church has met - and it is hard to leave.

But praise God we start a new era, looking forward to the many more joys and sorrows still ahead on our pilgrimage together.

.

Behold, how good and pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!

Psalm 133 : 1

.

(And yes, that's the church building in Walnut Grove!)

Our Own Bermuda Triangle

Today, somehow, who knows how...or why? my dear husband managed to delete my entire email section. OUR emails :o) Any one who has a large family and circle of friends, and enters into a lot of correspondence may empathise. They are no doubt somewhere with the swallowed socks, working pens and our reading glasses!

So, it's back to the Pollyanna game............

(It has taken me several hours to come to this point of clear headedness!)

I'm glad....that it was not my pictures which disappeared. Though I do copy to disc it is a while since I have done so and I have quite a lot of family history stuff in the pipe line.

I'm glad........ to be reminded that my emails and (very precious) communications, are not so valuable in the scheme of things. People (husbands) always come first.

I'm glad..... my youngest came and cuddled me and asked for a bed time story, just when I gave up on trying to retrieve them. XOXO

I'm glad..... tomorrow the home schoolers are attending a sports day with some christian school kids. I can go and cheer and socialise and generally forget my disaster.

I'm glad...... I am coming to a realisation that I am much more attached to the computer than I should be. I keep thinking I am dealing with it but..........

Old Time Values in a Modern World

"One of the greatest things a man can do for his children,

is to love their mother."

I read that quote many years ago so I am unable to give credit to the author. However, I have been pondering it today. Of course, a father who loves the Lord is a greater blessing to children.

"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church,

and gave himself for it."

Ephesians 5:25

The above photograph is probably not the most appropriate to the thoughts of marriage, husbands and happy families, but I love to use photos from my own family albums. The young woman on the left is my paternal grandmother in her teens, and is the only known picture of all eleven children together. Taken around 1908.

These pioneering ancestors remind me of the sacrifices, hard work, faith and commitment it takes to have a happy, successful and productive marriage and family. In our day and social climate, marriage and family are throw away, and sometimes valueless things. So many have lost the moral values of their parents and grandparents and adopted this worldly way of thinking. Serving self, ignoring God.

It is heartening to ponder, first, that God never changes, and his way is perfect. And secondly that there is a remnant even in this day, who are seeking to live for Christ.

"He setteth the solitary in families."