Anyone still reading out there?

Hello out there!  I'm going to try one of those "On this Day" Posts to see whether I am still able to write here and whether others out there still read blogs.  Please leave me a message if you read this.

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'For today, Thursday, February 5, 2015

Outside my window... everything is lush and green around us.  We have had some extremely hot days followed by some extremely heavy rain.  

Hearing...The hum of the air conditioner.  Can't live without it. Also the blare of the TV.  I can live without that but it's a good relaxer.

Pondering... The goodness and faithfulness of God.  I am home after another heart episode, a trip to Brisbane.  Why has God so graciously spared me?  again and again.  What is my calling to serve the Lord in the weary world? 

Praying... Always for my children, mostly that they will love the  Lord and live their lives in his service. For my grandchildren, that they will hear and learn His truth in their secular school and also repent and be saved.
"For the promise is to you and to your children and all those who are afar off, as many as the Lord thy God shall call."

Thankful for:  the above mentioned preservation.  Also for the amazing family and friends that I have the privilege to live with. The outpouring of care and concern during my illness encourages me.  Knowing that when these peoples say they are praying, they ARE praying!  and seeing the faithful answers come about.

Wearing... Green denim pants, swirly heart/paramecium top. I am not exactly a fashion plate :-)

Creating... A short article on child hood memories for  the Centenary of my hometown which is being celebrated on  Anzac Day..  The one hundred year anniversary of the Gallipoli landing

Going...  To the afore mentioned celebrations, Lord Willing.  My social life has narrowed a lot of recent years, as my health has deteriorated. 

Looking forward to...  Saturday when the family come over for fun and dinner.

In the kitchen... Not much happening there.  Keeping things simple with grills and salads and hoping my energy and love for cooking returns.

In the learning rooms... For each of us, our education continues.  My older boy completed Year 12 and is job seeking but has also got into a TAFE course starting early March.  My younger son is beginning Year 11 ......slowly, as his teacher slash mum gets back to speed. My eldest daughter, while still a stay at home mum of fours, has also signed up for a Certificate in Aged Care and hopes to eventually work in that area. Two grandsons have started Year One and one Prep.  The twins have five days a fortnight kindy with only the youngest of the six grandchildren still not in school.  Oh, the early years have just flown!

Around the house... hmmmm.....long grass and two weeks of bachelor life. 

Noticing that... The moment the dishes are washed.... others appear!

A peek into my world...

Five of my six grandchildren.
Still the light of my life!

Dust if you must

	Dust if you must, but wouldn't it be better, To paint a picture or write a letter, Bake a cake or plant a seed, Ponder the difference between want and need? Dust if you must, but there's not much time, With rivers to swim and mountains to climb, Music to hear and books to read, Friends to cherish and life to lead. Dust if you must, but the world's out there With the sun in your eyes, the wind in your hair, A flutter of snow, a shower of rain. This day will not come 'round again. Dust if you must, but bear in mind, Old age will come and it's not always kind. And when you go and go you must, You, yourself, will make more dust. Author unknown A friend posted this on FB today. It is very much how I am feeling about non-essential house work at the moment.  A construction site across the road has upped our dust accumulation of late. As my health declines I am more and more depending on the Lord to show me what is necessary and what can wait.....or perhaps what won't ever get done. I still have a few "mountains to climb" that is for sure!

I Must be Growing Up!

After several years of rainy wet seasons, as opposed to the many years prior of dry, wet seasons as well as dry, dry seasons  :-)  I finally bought myself an umbrella!  Gone are the days of being the only lady turning up to church unprepared, I whipped out my little brolly and I fitted right back in. It made me feel quite grown up.  Did I ever mention that the first time I attended our (very conservative) little church, back in the mid 80s, it was on the back of my now husband's motor bike.  Needless to say I was totally wind swept!  Through babies and toddlers and then through various health issues, I have always seemed to manage to arrive looking rather the worse for wear! Well, one has a reputation to uphold!

It is raining here.  Grey, windy, miserable rain coming from the cyclone which reached the North Queensland coast on Friday night at Category 4 (down graded from a 5 as it made land). The system is down to a Cat 1 but slowly moving down the coast so bringing rain and wind to this normally sunny part of the land.

Much needed rain fell a few weeks ago in the west of the State but as usual pockets are still missing out and desperately dry.  We quote nostalgically that we love this sunburnt country, but doesn't she deal us some heart break?

Wow! Months  have passed since I blogged and while it has been very busy it is hard to know what to write.
Shall I write about the delicious meals we"ve had  and having some special people over to share them? Nah, Macaroni Beef. Spaghetti Bol and Honey soy drum sticks are just not the stuff of exciting reading.

And even though I have been silent here for quite a while you are very well acquainted with my daughters and the small people who steal my time and my heart ♥  I don't need to regale you with antics about how clever they are and all the cute things they say and do. Or perhaps the joy that they bring to my life and the smiles I catch myself with even at the thought of them?

Shall I mention that we had the best week of school thus far this year a couple of weeks before break up? That my very energetic young lad who can't concentrate for more than a few moments on any one thing actually got a couple of his subjects finished and that my older son is liking his TAFE course, though it has been daunting. Okay, things spiralled down a bit towards the end of term so I need not mention that. And these same delightful handsome and well mannered teen aged boys are also bringing down our grey hairs...but enough said about that, I think.

Perhaps you have not called over here to read all this frivolous stuff but to find something more deep and meaningful? I seem at a loss for much of any depth these days.  My kidney function has steadily dropped and I am experiencing the occasional bout of angina. I get very tired now so our busy life is about all I can cope with.  I am having very little social life outside the family and that seems fine for me just now. I have been very much appreciating a fortnightly bible study with a small, interested and interesting group of believers. I press forward knowing and experiencing the everlasting arms safely beneath me.

As always, God is supplying all our needs!

The Parent Trap

The trap...that which ensnares us, is falling in love with that little baby.  Right from the womb we build a relationship with our babies.  When they are born we nurture them and give them roots.  As they grow we try to encourage them to spread their wings.











Over the years we make choices which seem like the right thing at the time.  Alas we sometimes make mistakes. We know that only God is unchanging and always does what is best for us who believe in Him.  Sometimes the object of our love just doesn't see that. Sometimes they grow up and decide we were wrong and they take a different path.  Sometimes they want to blot us out of the their lives.

Oh Sea of Heartbreak!

Please forgive my ramble dear readers.  It seems that in the almost five years that I have been blogging my

whole life and perspective has changed.  Truly, I am still the same loving, affectionate person, but wounded. Rejection is hard...........  Keeping positive is more so..........Failing is shattering.

Our Lord Jesus was despised and rejected.
He is acquainted with all our sorrow and grief.
Into Your hands I commend my spirit, O Lord.

Trading Places

Year  9 Boarders
1976

About 35 years ago. I was a boarder at The Range College (Our Lady of Good Council) here in Rockhampton. I'm sure I have mentioned before that this girls only school is now only the girls' boarding section of the co-ed Catholic school.  Where our class rooms once stood is now a Retirements Village and in fact my parents lived for five years right about where I went to Science classes way back then.  Where the convent stood is now a low care facility for elderly folk.  This is where my Mum lives now and shared with Dad for the last twelfth months of his life.

The school photograph above was taken in front of a huge fig tree in the convent garden.  From Mum's front balcony you look straight out on this tree.  It is a marvellous view, one of the highest in Rocky, partly blocked by the enormous and very old tree.  It is beautiful though it does block the view a bit.

As I left from visiting Mum this week waves of grief rolled over me.   True, I feel the loss of my Dad much more there in that room where he lived for those last few months and died. But I was also overcome by the  great sense of the "circle of life" happening in my family.  Dad and Mum were very inter-dependant in the last few years.  Dad had gone blind so Mum was the eyes. Mum has no memory, so Dad remembered everything.  Although he couldn't see, she would tell him where each thing had been put and then when Mum couldn't remember where she had put it, Dad knew ! Dad could still remember names, dates and places. Mum struggles to recall her own birthday and much in the way of past events.

So now Mum depends on us.  Mainly my eldest sister and I.  My sister had already been doing all of their bookwork for a number of years and she does everything the way Dad wanted it.  Mum can rely on her to pay all the bills and do any transaction or legal stuff.

I am the day to day daughter :-)  I visit and drink coffee and pick up bits and pieces that Mum needs.  She is quite miserable.  She says she is not lonely but she loves visits.  They tire her out and she does sleep a lot.  She also does not remember conversations and information from one visit to the next but is just contented with her limited life. The other day she wandered a little too far and got herself lost.  Fortunately she was still on the property and was rescued by a nurse.

When I left the other day, I thought about how they must have felt driving away and leaving us there at school.  I was twelve.  I got homesick.  I so appreciated visitors and especially treasure another sister who was at uni then, making the effort to visit a lot and bringing goodies (which she could ill afford), Now it's me finding it heart wrenching to drive away.  Holding her frail body, I am over come by love and real admiration for this dear woman.  Our roles have almost swapped and it seems fitting. She wiped our bottoms ~ and smacked them!  She fed and clothed us and sacrificed a lot so that we could all have the necessities of life. It seems the least we can do.

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On the home front

I am enjoying the one-on-one  home schooling time with my older son.  He is more settled as well and has  taken up more of the household chores since his brother has gone to school.  I reckon school life is much more taxing than staying at home. In most ways I feel my son has been well prepared for the life outside and we are thrilled and amazed at his good adjustment.  Getting up early and having a whole day out of the house and coping with life can be quite exhausting. Sometimes he just crashes when he gets home, other days he is quite demanding and his behaviour upsets everyone anew.  His mental health issues have not disappeared but they do seem to have improved.  Thank you for all prayers.

The weather here is fabulous! Cool nights, glorious sunny days. Ahhhh.....this is when Central Queensland is at her best!

Of Babies, big boys and limitations.

Our "baby" turned fourteen last week!

I am constantly amazed at the accelerating passage of time!

He was such a huggy, happy baby.  In many ways he still is.  Life and the journey through it moulds and shapes us. Sometimes in good, great even, ways and sometimes it seems to take the stuffing out of us.  I see that in his life just now.  He is still the same eager, helpful, sensitive lad but he can be a young man with the cares of the worlds on his shoulders.

We pray.

We encourage.

We wait on the Lord!

oo0oo

At times I feel like a young child myself :-)

As I spend time with my parents I seem to still regard myself as their little child.

My Dad is very weak and frail.

He believes he is dying.

Alas, aren't we all?

But as I drive away I don't remember the fragile, white haired man

snuggled up in foetal position.

Blind, almost deaf and dependant.

I let my mind travel back to those long ago golden days..

I see the hero of my childhood.

Broad shouldered and laughing.

Hoisting strainer posts effortlessly to his shoulders.

Chopping wood with strong, even strokes.

Patient, dependable.

Again we pray.

We encourage.

And wait on the Lord.

oo0oo

Old age limits my parents greatly.

But they accept, for the most part, with dignity and acceptance.

I feel limited by my lack of health and strength

yet I know and rejoice that

"The joy of the Lord is my strength"!

and

"Godliness with contentment is great gain."

Isaiah 40:31

But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

I like it A LOT!

Our life is still very full but some of the chaos seems to have calmed down this week. Phew!

If only............

It goes without saying that I have missed my daughter and her children A LOT! being the first week that I have not seen them every day!  I miss their spontaneous cuddles and eager eyes.  Little twin boy, the moment he sees me runs for a ball and throws and catches for as long as I can keep it up.  Little twin girl wants me to put on her shoes and often just wants to sit on my lap when we visit.  The older boys are full of exciting events and achievements.  They all seem to have suddenly grown up A LOT!  Sigh......

I won't deny, I am loving the quiet.  I am savouring the personal space and less of everything....cooking, washing, folding, cleaning!

Suddenly I am like most other grandmothers and having to make a time for visits and fitting in with their new routine and they with ours.  It is amazing how easily we have slotted back into our old ways and I know that school for my boys is going to benefit A LOT!

The same for my other daughter and her boys since her eldest is at kindy. Oh dear, it is like weaning!  Needless to say, I have much to learn and experience of this role of mother and grandmother.  A LOT!

With a quieter house, my time for reading and prayer has come so naturally.  I have yearned for this and really appreciate it now.  While there are lots of ongoing needs in our house everything is so much less frantic and "solvable " :-)

I've listened to a number of Glen Campbell numbers today through the link which led me to the clip below.

Here is a little gem to sign off with today.  Even if you are not a fan you must love this classic?   I like it  A LOT!

Glen Campbell is suffering from Alzheimer's and  here he is playing Dueling Banjos (one of my faves) with his daughter at his farewell concert.

Of Deep Thoughts and Shallow Lives

He leads me beside the still waters

For quite a long time, when I first began to blog, I posted on a regular topic "Sabbath Thoughts".  Now, it's not that these thoughts and ponderings have dried up completely, but I very seldom dabble in posts like that any more.  There are a couple of reasons.

One thing was that being uncertain of my readership, those who do not comment, I wanted to be careful what may be coming across as "teaching". 

Another thing was that the more I read around the internet, the more I found material with which I disagreed.  I try hard not to get embroiled in debates, especially on topics which might be considered straining a gnat. They will know we are Christians by the love we have for one another.  I want to be able to fellowship and enjoy all who profess Christ. I did not want my blog to become a place where offences were caused and harsh words were exchanged.  I think I've managed that.  I do not know whether I am always true to my own heart on some things but if I can't find a something good  to comment, then I don't comment at all (Thanks Mum!)

I have also experienced a long and difficult period in my life through which I am still wading.  Although I am a battle weary warrior of nearly thirty years experience I have not coped so well with some of the trials which have beset us.

Some one very close and influential let me down badly :- (  How childish and immature I have been about this.  I've had lots of disappointments in my life and they have served to show me more clearly that the only faithful and dependable one is God.  Man, male and female, will always disappoint, as we ourselves do.  I put too much store by what this person said and have felt crushed in the fall out.  I feel too drained emotionally and spiritually to share very much here.

The old saying "When mumma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" comes to mind. Have I dropped my bundle to the detriment of my family, my husband, my friends? They would say no, but deep down I know that I have not behaved and lead by example as I might have done in the past.

Time is healing this wound.  God is gently showing me my failings. I do not want to loose that ability to reach out and love and trust people, but deep hurt takes a good deal of time to resolve. All of us here have been affected and I especially grieve for my teenage boys who have seen some unpleasantness between adults who profess the Lord.  I remember this happening when my girls were in their early teens too and it grieves all the more as I know it to be a factor in their walking away from the Lord. All of my children are covenanted to be the Lord's and I trust that in His time they will search for and trust in Him.

God, give me grace to accept with serenity

the things that cannot be changed,

Courage to change the things

which should be changed,

and the Wisdom to distinguish

the one from the other.

Reinhold Neibuhr

Our lives become very shallow and meaningless if we turn back from what we know is the straight path.  Here in this place a little faithful group of believers meets together in the manner which we believe is honouring to our great God. It is simple but deep. We hold his Word to be precious and his Saints to be dear.  As my family and I move forward, we struggle with the changes that have come about in our lives.  Hubby and I find it difficult to keep the Lord's Day in the way we used to and sometimes our family worship times are greatly interrupted.  Personal time too.  I confess, I am often distracted by all the busy-ness of small children, school and family that old routines seem to have gone by.  Have I become shallow?  We do not want our lives to become just so, so.  We long to display our love and loyalty to our Lord and Savior.

The Lord is on my side

I will not fear.

Not Sabbath Thoughts but the random thoughts of a tired heart ♥

It's Wednesday!

It's Wednesday and we had pizza for tea.

Not exactly a blogging head line snatcher but big news in our house as we usually only ever have pizza on a Friday.  Friday is Dad does tea night.  Today however was one of those days when 6.00pm rolled around and although I had meat out nothing was even started for tea.  The babies and toddlers were tired and cranky and I might add so was the cook. Just a little.  Frazzled perhaps describes me better, so my daughter's suggestion of pizza went down very well.



The "Utopia" 150 year celebration was a great day out!

About 200 people crowded into the Library for the launch of a book recounting the life and voyages of the "Utopia" and  the passengers and crew of that first migrant ship to arrive directly to Rockhampton.  Though I know the history of my own family it was great to see them there among the interesting stories of others who settled here at that time.
My Dad's cousin at 91 was the oldest descendant present and got to cut the cake, along with one of his distant cousins who had travelled the farthest for the event.  (From Canada)

The lunch was made interesting for me being able to sit with the mother of two of my friends.  Knowing them since the eighties we never realised then that our great, great, grandparents had travelled together to the land down under way back in the 1860s.
 A maritime historian gave a very interesting talk after lunch on shipping and immigration at that time in Australia's history and the actual happenings around the arrival of the boat. Including a stoush between the indigenous people and the new settlers. The Durrumble people were acknowledged on several occasions throughout the day.

Then about 150 descendants took the bus tour around the original part of town.  This was commentated by one of the local history buffs and he not only knew his stuff but painted a vivid picture of old Rocky town, what little there was of it in 1862.  This tour ended with a wander through the old cemetery where both my Bond and Rattenbury great, great grandparents are buried as well as later members of those families.

The Utopia

If the Brits who came here thought this would be Utopia then perhaps, or no doubt, they were sorely disappointed.  Many scattered to other parts of Queensland and the rest of Australia.  Judging by the turn-out at this reunion and the enthusiasm among the attendees I think many have found Rocky to be a great place to be.
The local news paper slogan is "We live here because we love it"!!!!!


Off to Brisbane again this weekend.

This time to celebrate my father-in-law's eightieth birthday! You may recall from past blogs that I am not a real fan of Brisbane.  It is a rat race!  But seeing family is always good and I don't mind these trips when hubby is with me as he can deal with the maps and chaos much better than me.
We have certainly had a lot of family celebrations this year.  Only another oh, six or seven weeks until I hit the big 50!

This will be like a mid term break for the boys and I. When we get back we will be into the final few weeks of school for the year.  We are hoping to be finished end of November but.......

Grounded

"Friendships are like roses, the petals die but the perfume never fades away."

I was privileged this week to meet with a couple of old school friends.  It seems that as we age and our children leave home, there is more time and inclination to renew and build on some of these old friendships.  As I've mentioned before my high school years were spent in a boarding school.. Life long friendships are often planted when our formative years are spent in such close contact.

My old buddies seem to accept that I am a christian and sometimes make exceptions or apologies when I am there and something is said or done which I might not think funny/ appropriate.  This is without my saying so, they just do.

I am  very fortunate in this whole friend department with sisters, relatives and many christian women who have become my mentors, confidantes and sounding boards. I treasure these who are mostly women of faith and share so many views and commitments with me. Our friendships are based either around family ties or faith.  I always know I will get good solid advise and realistic comfort and I thank God for that.

It's different with these old school mates! What a motley crew we are! But after this meeting, I was struck by the wisdom and maturity of these ladies.  True, that wisdom is not from God and His Word but rather a worldly type, but solid non the less. These girls are grounded.  Because of our very long friendship we are able to discuss many and varied topics and share our joys, heartaches and goals openly.  Particularly on a matter that had been troubling me with one of my children, I experienced real connection and a light toward resolution on hearing one of my friends story of a child in a similar situation (Of course, I thought no one else had every had this problem :-).  Also one of these ladies who has had some very tough life experiences helped me to see things a little better concerning my daughter who is left as a single mother.

I love the Godly wisdom of my "usual" friends but I know that some of these situations are out of their sphere of experience.  I hope that I can be a realistic listener and advisor when it's needed. I suppose it is something to ponder as we deal with all who come across our path ~ sympathy, empathy, patience, shared experiences.  Of course we know that Our Jesus is the ultimate answer and we want to share it, but to the unsaved it is impossible to fathom that what ever is happening is God's will. We need to tread thoughtfully.

My cousin, my friend

"You can choose your friends but not your relatives."

One of my special friendships is with my cousin who lost her husband twelve months ago.  It is hard to believe it is a year.  So much has transpired.  I have come to love and admire her all the more for the strength and courage she has shown during this period of mourning. Again, I hope I have been the patient listening support I have wanted to be.

Do you sometimes feel, as I do, that our lives become so busy and fraught with drama that it is easy to forget the ones that need to be comforted, that are lonely, that are ill?

I hope that each one reading will forgive yet another one of my little waffles.  Also that you, like me do have a wonderful circle of family and friends in which you feel loved and are able to contribute to as well.

A big weekend

We have a busy weekend ahead with the Homeschooler's concert tomorrow and the "Utopia" reunion on Sunday.  I am still unable to load my photos on here which is annoying as I have a couple of beauties of the kids! 

Have a good weekend.

Meeting the Challenges

One day at a time.
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Being a little overwhelmed by some of the present challenges that life holds before me, I came to the realisation that without challenges, it would be a very boring existence indeed!

I am constantly put to the test by technology :-) This week it is my printer. I have put in a new ink cartridge only to be told that it will not print because the cartridge is not genuine.  The trouble being, it is a genuine cartridge.  I do not have the smarts to inform my computer of this fact and so have not been able to print anything out.  It is amazing just how much printing one needs to do when one can not :-)

A serious challenge at present is planning for the 2013 academic year.  My older son will be Year 11 age.  He has no huge goals at present but is keen to try out different things and gain skills.  He is not, however, keen to attend TAFE, which was the way we thought we were heading.  The pre-vocational courses run during Years 11 and 12 look really good and interesting and useful for life no matter what he decides to do. The sticking point is the "classroom" element which is a component even of the hands on courses.  I understand that because I am his teacher and I know the challenges he has to face each day.  His Year 11 & 12 subjects will be through the Enrichment Program with Groves DE so basically continuing at his present ability.  He would like to do some work as well as school if not attending TAFE.  I am for this also but I know having had others working casual jobs and completing schooling that often the hours the student can actually do school work can be limited. 

Second son will move up to year nine but also has many challenges.
For me the great challenge at present is motivation.  They are past the stage of carefree days rambling the Botanical Gardens for leaves and bugs.  They are almost through their school years and looking at a working life but still struggling with many of the basics.
Some days it is tough to be positive and inspiring!  Come on all you creative people out there.  What do you do to ignite the fires of imagination in flailing young minds?

It is a challenge living here in our once large but growing smaller home :-).
This is one challenge that has so many good sides that it is really not weighing on my mind.  Of course, there are days, today being one, where we all heave a collective sigh when the little darlings finally go to bed.  Four active, inquisitive toddlers generate a lot of noise, mess, washing, chaos, did I say mess?  But I do love those little guys ♥
If only we could get a clear day to clean .... before the troops come tromping back through the house! I am grateful, in a strange sort of twist, that I do have a worn out, falling apart, going to mildew sort of house.  How hard I would find it if everything was "precious".

My greatest personal challenge is to keep myself on an even keel health wise.  After poor results two months ago, my Renal Clinic appointment today was a little more encouraging.  I am never going to "get better" but by being as diligent as possible my blood sugars are slightly better, my Renal function is stable, blood pressure is fine. While the heat tends to make my battle with tiredness worse, our Spring has been reasonable so far and I am enjoying the days.

My No.2 grandson was four on the weekend and again my gadgets let me down. (Seeing a pattern here?)  Therefore I have no photos to show of the fantastic little fellow with his gorgeous green frog umbrella!  Something to look forward to, eh?

The Birthday Boy

Because blog reading seems to have become almost a past fad, I am probably writing a little more personally than I used to because I know all you fine ladies who read or at least comment here.  So many blogs have finished now and I am missing some of those which I found particularly uplifting. I am not planning to cease.  For two years now I have only posted once or twice a week and I enjoy the journalling aspect of it. 

So, to all who drop by here this week.  Take up your challenges one by one.   Do not be anxious for anything and cast your burdens upon the Lord for he shall sustain you. He will never suffer the righteous to be moved.

Philippians 4:6

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

The First 600

As I sat reading through my blog reader just now, the information bar at the top of the page reminded me that I had posted 599 posts at "Mumma's Place" !  Wow!  Almost four years of scribbles here on my little part of the web!  So, this is number 600 and I wasn't actually planning a post so I don't have a lot to say.

Perhaps a lot of my posts have been like that?  Just the random mumblings of a stay-at-home mum.  I know my earlier posts came a lot more regularly and I enjoyed blogging to a loose schedule.  Theological, family, school, memories.  Now, I post only about once a week and often just to remind myself that we actually did do stuff that week.  It is a diary of sorts.

One of the things I love most about blogging is all the wonderful characters I have met out there.  Some with very similar ideas and lives and others with very different ones.  In a stage of life where I am often unable to get out and about for social things, this has been a real delight and blessing.

I saw this little plaque recently and thought it humorous:

Every visitor brings joy to this house ~
Some when they arrive
And others when they leave!







I hope there are lots of good people bringing joy into your home!  Have a great weekend everyone.  The brilliant sunshine here is Central Queensland invites us to get outside and soak it up.

Ponderings...

I have a lot of ideas and thoughts floating around in my head this week. (Always dangerous!)  Of life and death.  Of family and the ties which bind us.  Of loved ones who have been the strongest influences in our lives and  old friends who have come into our life for a short time and perhaps are never heard of again ~ or the ones who you providentially run into along the way. Of the Church, the Body of Christ, and how when one member (part) suffers the whole body suffers.

My dad will be eighty-eight at the end of the month.  He is in hospital again with similar problems to the last stint, but medication is working and he is loosing the fluid, slowly, from his chest and the rest of his body. He was much chirpier today which is always a good sign.

My mother, who will soon be eighty-three, is coping well with lots of attention and care in the home and quite a few family visitors.

But the reality is....they are getting old and will not be with us forever.
It makes you realise the huge responsibility we have as parents ourselves, to raise and teach our children in the small amount of time we are given with them. The opportunity we have to influence them for good is enormous. 

A few weeks ago, our Pastor resigned due to his chronic ill health.  I may write about this at some later time but for now it is enough to say that at a very spiritually arid time in my life this has come as a great blow.  We are a very small and formally close knit group and we are suffering, grieving.  It may be that our little congregation will not survive as a group?  I don't know.  What I do know is that God will supply all our needs.  He has never failed to do so before.  Our former Pastor and his large family need a lot of prayer too as they explore life out of the ministry.

Also  a few weeks ago I posted about the alarming number of marriage break ups we were hearing of among family and friends.  Only days after that post I received a phone call from a friend in Canberra saying he would not be coming up as planned because his wife had left him.  We were gob smacked.  Totally shocked.  A christian couple we had met many years ago when all our children were small and both families had taken on the great challenge of home schooling.  They lived round the block from us.  We minded their house when they were on holidays, they came over for meals.  Years later after they had been gone south for nearly ten years their son came back to work and we had the pleasure of his company here for many meals and fun times with us.  Each year when they travelled back to visit family we would see them and each year they would try to convince us to trek to Canberra.  Good friends, great people.  This has been so sad to hear of.

I know I do not need to share so much on the blog, but it is therapeutic to write some of these thoughts and share them with you bloggy friends. 

Proverbs 18:10

The name of the LORD is a strong tower:

the righteous runneth into it, and is safe.

Grrrr........... Computers!

It seems we can't live without them but neither can we live amiciably with them!  Yes, our computer is old so we often have glitches which, over time, become major problems.  We are blessed with a couple of friends who actually know a bit about the inner workings of the beast, unlike us. 

Today I sit at the very conveniently installed booths at our local super market.  When I sat down about half an hour ago to check all the important stuff :-)  (emails, scrabble games, face book) I was the only user of the five booths but now all but one are in use.  I am totally accustomed to a racket going on as I write a post but this is ridiculous!

At home we are debating the direction to take as far as this can't-live-without technology.  Our old one should be up and running over the weekend.  But with five users and high demand the majority of us are plugging for a) an upgrade and b) another beast to join the family.  I am checking out lap tops and other fancy portable devises.  The kids are very keen on this option!  They pointed out that I can use it while watching TV (apparently  men/ boys are beginning to multi-task too!) but the few TV shows I watch are my veg out times.  Plus, I need conserntration to read blog posts etc!  It is convenient for school.  Hey, we have to walk, oh at least three metres from the school room to the computer desk!  I can even pull it out at Maccas or a long wait at the doctors.  

Hubby is not keen for it.  He has the valid point that we have always had our computer in any open place where we can supervise what's being read etc.  I think he secretly fears I, and everyone else, may spend tooooo much time on it, which is also a valid point.  Two divided by five could jack up the usage.

I don't like to admit it, but I think I will/ would be tempted to doodle away on it at the learning area, which is something I have always tried to avoid.  Would I get to the stage of needing it near while I cook, wash, iron?  Do any of you do this?  Oooops, giggles, I don't iron :-)

So what do you prefer?  Your computer with it's nice big screen and keyboard ? your laptop? tablet? ipad? or some other doovy?? I admit I am hopeless at typing on touch screens so I am more of a key board person.  I'd value your opinions as I wade through catalogues trying to understand the terminology and decide what I actually need.  Need?  Hmm...what I want.

A lot of stuff have happened here over our Semester Break.  We've had a good holiday and a few special occasions.  I hope to catch you all up soon.  Not enough time for me to blog read at your places just now.  I hope all my regular blog friends are going well.  God bless!

(I hope there aren't too many typos.  Spell check doesn't seem to be doing its job.

Two Shall be One

Three years ago I blogged about my broken heartedness over the break up in a marriage of a couple very close to me.  In that time that marriage has been dissolved and the two parties have gone their separate ways, living lives which only overlap because there are children involved.

I also posted about values and the commitment needed to make a lasting, loving and successful marriage here. I was overwhelmed then by the seeming loss of old fashioned (biblical) values in our modern world where every one seems to think it is all about "ME".

During those years my own daughters have had de facto relationships.  One is planning to marry, the other has left a very tense and hurtful situation.  Other couples not so close to us have also parted.  Friends and relatives my own age, brought up with good Christian principles and solid parental examples. What is happening in our world?  The basic unit of society, the family is being steadily, but surely eroded.

The lobby for same sex marriage to become legal is so active that we cannot watch news items or advertisements without abominable images flashed before us.  This generation is being brain washed to think that self and happiness and individual needs are the most important and fulfilling goals to strive for. Putting aside  the biblical detestation of man/man, woman/ woman  sexual relationships , I do not understand why the term marriage, defined in the Westminster Confession of Faith as one man and one woman, is being high jacked.  Call it what you like.....we know it as sin.

Like many families we have our share of relationships and lifestyles which fall out of the pattern of the two parent family.  We don't hate these family members or avoid them, nor do we agree with their life style.  These marriage break ups, painful as they are and usually not the fault of any one person, put us in awkward positions.  How do we now treat the person who is not your relative/ friend before their union.  I have remained close to my sister-in-law and given as much love and encouragement to her and the children as possible under the circumstances .   My brother has a new partner.  She is a lovely woman and brings two children of her own to the relationship.  It's a tangled web!

Every marriage encounters trials, difficulties, strains.  My own has experienced many.  What is the key to holding it together?  Why did so many less couples part in our parents era, despite equally trying  circumstances.  My parents have been married for 61 years.  They have had enormous trials and griefs during that long marriage.  Today they are blessed to share the twilight years in one small room together in mostly contented unison. 

In my wedding vows I said the words "until God shall separate us by death."  That is a serious vow to make. It was sworn before God and before the congregation and has helped to keep my eyes focused when I have been tempted to escape.  Commitment is one huge thing and for Christians, the fact that there are three in our marriages ~ God, our husband and ourselves. 

Forgiveness is the heart of the gospel and should be our heart attitude at all times.  Forgive those small and annoying things and don't let them grow into big issues.

I know there are genuine cases where a marriage has been dissolved.  Our Confession lists adultery and utterly forsaking as valid reasons for divorce.  Other believes hold differing views.  Even in legitimate circumstances if a guilty party is truly repentant the offended one must forgive and then perhaps is able to continue in the marriage also.  This takes a lot of selflessness but by God's grace is possible.

This is all going through my head at present with the very sad and startling news this week of another couple, also fairly close to me, parting ways.  Beautiful young people, seemingly happy, five gorgeous children.  I was so grieved on hearing this I wept.  For the couple, their parents (my sister) and especially the children. I am praying now that God will do a mighty work of reconciliation for these two.  What God has joined together, let no man put asunder.

So, if you have one, hug your hubby today and show him you love him.  This is often really difficult to do, I know.  We must try to not let the sun go down on any differences we have.  Our children are counting on us to lead by example.  If professing Christians do not love,  as Christ and the Church, what hope for the world?.

Honour your father and your mother

My mum and dad recently moved into a low care hostel  in an aged care facility near by us.  I am so grateful that in their retirement they moved to Rockhampton.  Although the farm holds many precious childhood memories the hub of our family is now in that little unit where our two dear grey and frail parents reside. ♥♥

The three weeks since they moved in there have been very hectic with Mum having a small operation to have a sun cancer removed and Dad ending up in hospital for most of the last week.  It seems their move has been just at the right time and the staff have been wonderful ... to them and to us.  We are rather like an overwhelming bunch of mother hens I fear, but they have been patient with us!

I am the only sibling actually living here in town so a lot of the visiting, running around and chores do fall to me.  God has been very gracious to give me strength over the last couple of weeks. I have one sister living close by who does a lot and cares for all the finacial matters etc for Mum and Dad. Dad is still very sharp in his mind but has gone blind.  I consider it very precious to have had my parents for so long (87 & 82 years of age).  Scripture tells us that we are to honour our father and mother.  I know that mine have not been difficult to honour because they are fine, upstanding people.  I think of that promise ~  that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.  I know that my parents honoured and respected their own parents and have been indeed blessed with long lives.

One of the most difficult areas for me to "honour" my parents has been that of our faith.  I am a Bible believing Christian.  I avow the 5 Solas.  It is Scripture alone for me.  So while I have tried to love and respect them I can not adhere to the many extra Biblical practices that they do. I have complete peace and trust in God that he does all things well and that as judge of all the earth he will do right.  I know that some of my family do not consider me heaven bound because I have walked away from the "one true church".  All I have been able to do is to live a life before God which I pray will show forth my love and trust in my Lord and Saviour.

So many families now are riddled with divorce, remarriages  and de facto relationships that the family tree can sometimes be a very twisted and complicated one.  It must be so difficult to honour parents who have been negligent, abusive or totally absent.  But amazingly God gives grace even for that to those who love him.  I know that in my reckless pre-Christian days I often neglected the good teaching and sensible advise of my parents.  I now know the pain of watching that rebellion  in my own children, but I am also beginning to reap the great joy of a deeper relationship both with my parents and with my own maturing children.  How gracious is God to set the solitary in families.  Thank you Lord.

Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.

Thoughts from the Heart on Anzac Day

For the first time in a lot of years I did not  attend the Anzac Day march this morning.  Too long standing and walking for me at the moment.  Most of the rest of the household turned out.  I stayed here with the twins and sang them Advance Australia Fair and Waltzing Matilda,  and other sustaining songs .

As always I have found the articles and clips moving today.  A couple of new songs I had not heard before. Adam Brand ~ The Anzac and  Ragged Bloody Heroes  posted by Ann at Eight Acres of Eden. ( A Kiwi living in Oz)

I've written before of my  grandfather  here and here  and my great love and admiration for him.. Strangely, although that rose-tinted view is still the way I remember my Grandad, in the last few months I have had much to mull over about his life and character.  We knew him as a sage and often jolly old man, sitting in his cane chair on the veranda, smoking a pipe, telling a yarn, rousing on the nippers.

 In the past few months as some of my cousins have met to organise our upcoming, "100 Years on the Block" celebrations, we have been able to talk about our memories.  Also my Uncle who is putting together a book of Family History, my Dad, who is the oldest living  member of the family, and my three aunts have all contributed and answered questions.  Although they loved their parents dearly, my grandparents,  they grew up in a generation which was much more rigid and austere.  Where children were seen but not heard at the tea table, yes, even in the shanty in the bush.  Where war, drought, flood, and the Great Depression cast a gloomy shadow over youthful exuberance and survival was the main priority in life. 

My grandfather was a devoutly religious man and obviously he would tolerate no rebellion from his children,  Some in the end left the farm either to join the army in WW2 or for other jobs. Some left on not the best of terms.  Some of the nine stayed and loved the land all the days of their lives.  To me, it seems that my Grandfather may have suffered much more emotionally and spiritually than the physical wounds of his battle scars showed.  My heart aches for him, for my grandmother and the loneliness and toilsome heartache of her lonely bush life, trying to soothe the pain which gruesome, senseless warfare had inflicted on her husband.  I ache for my father too,  who it seems was able to speak very little to his father of sensitive things and finds it hard to relay the same to us his children.

Last weekend I attended the 21st birthday celebrations of one of my nephews.  My brother spoke so lovingly and humorously in his speech to his son and finished simply with "I love you, son."  Teary eyed, I told him afterwards how precious his words were and as we hugged he told me he had resolved to say that because, you know....................  He said no more, but I knew.  In our fabulous family, through all that golden childhood which I hold so dear, there were some who never seemed to be able to say those precious words.  I am so thankful that this generation is different.  That we openly speak of our love, of our hurts and disappointments.  That we encourage one another and stand by in support when the chips are down.  Those things were always done but saying those three words can touch a person's heart in a way no other thing can.  In generations past, love was expressed in the hard work and loyalty one showed and it was great love.  Love in fact which was prepared to lay down their lives for us.

Lest we forget......